Q&A Part 7: Why me? Why now?

Editor’s Note: Welcome to part six of our series, Questions & Answers. This series will attempt to cover topics and/or questions which have been raised by readers. Feel free to submit your own questions, and we’ll see what we can do about addressing them.

If I could have the world and all it owns
A thousand kingdoms, a thousand thrones
If all the earth were mine to hold
With wealth my only goal

I’d spend my gold on selfish things
Without the love that Your life brings
Just a little bit more is all I’d need
Till life was torn from me

I’d rather be in the palm of Your hand
Though rich or poor I may be
Faith can see right through the circumstance
Sees the forest in spite of the trees
Your grace provides for me

Why me? Why now? Those are the questions we ask when tragedy strikes. Why God? How could you let this happen? Did I do something wrong for you to do this to me? Why me? Why now?

It’s been a year since I wrote https://acceptinghardships.wordpress.com/2017/07/26/celebratebraddog/. I know it’s been a year not simply because my blog tells me when things were written but because my children turned one last week. And if my twins just celebrated their birthday, then it has also been one year since my friend Jason and his wife Amy lost their eldest child, Brad.

Why me? Why now? Why, on the very night that my children entered the world, were my friends struck by such unimaginable circumstances? Why do I get to hold my babies every night while they shed tears and laughter over memories of what was and what could have been? Why do we have to go through the ups and downs of life never knowing what tomorrow has in store? I don’t know.

That’s just part of it. I don’t have all the answers. Nobody else does, either. We can speculate and postulate until we’re blue in the face, but sometimes life just happens.

I’m tired of trying to explain everything. I’m tired of overthinking and second guessing and grasping at straws rather than trusting that God is in control. God’s got this. Does that mean that God wanted Bradley to die in a tragic accident? No, of course not. That’s not part of God’s plan. That’s not part of God’s justice. But God’s got this. God will provide. God will help us make the most of a lousy situation.

Why me? Why now? The questions make me sick to my stomach. Things happen in our lives that break our hearts. Sometimes we have to deal with the feeling on a recurring basis that our hearts are breaking over and over again. If we’re lucky, we realize that it’s a phase – it’s a season – we’ll get through it. But that’s hard. Knowing that God is in control makes it easier, but it doesn’t make it easy. We will get through it. Things will be better. If not now, eventually.

So we batten down the hatches. We weather the storm. We come to understand that even though things will be different on the other side, there is another side. We’re stuck now, but we’re not stuck here forever. Life goes on. We adjust to a new normal. We don’t have to like it, but we’re short on choices. And if it comes to trusting in God or relying on our own strength and abilities to get through, there’s really only one viable option.

My best thinking, my best laid plans, my desire to be in control, will be knocked down and thwarted every time. Temporary success is still doomed to failure if we aren’t willing or capable of turning things over to God. Why me? Why now? Cause that’s just the way it is, but everything in this life is temporary. Life with God is abundant and eternal.

Let’s stop asking why me and why now. Let’s start asking what’s next.

If I should walk the streets, no place to sleep
No faith in promises You keep
I’d have to way to buy my bread
With a bottle for my bed

But if I trust the one who died for me
Who shed his blood to set me free
If I live my life to trust in You
Your grace will see me through

I’d rather be in the palm of Your hand
Though rich or poor I may be
Faith can see right through the circumstance
Sees the forest in spite of the trees

If I could have the world…

– Alex Walker

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